What to Do When You Get Mad

If you find yourself getting angry while on the job--whether it's from being overwhelmed, tired or frustrated, consider trying one or more of these seven tips.

1.  Call "Time-Out."

• Before you say or do something you will regret, say, "I need to take a time-out."  Then walk away from the situation, take a deep breath and count to 10.  Take this time to think about what you want to say.  Only return when you feel calm and in control.

2.  Get your finger on the "Edit" button.

• In the heat of the moment, it's easy to say something you'll later regret.  By taking a few moments to collect your thoughts before saying anything, you'll be able to press that edit button before the thoughts become words.

3.  Use "I" statements.

• Avoid criticizing or placing blame by talking about how you are feeling with "I" statements.  For example, say "I feel really embarrassed about this mistake." instead of, "You made a horrible mistake that makes us all look bad."

4. Find the humor.

• Lightening up can help diffuse tension. Don't use sarcasm, though — it can hurt feelings and make things worse.

5.  Don't hold a grudge.

• Forgiveness is a powerful tool. If you allow anger and other negative feelings to crowd out positive feelings, you might find yourself swallowed up by your own bitterness or sense of injustice. But if you can forgive someone who angered you, you might both learn from the situation.

6.  Practice relaxation skills.

• During a time when you do not feel angry, plan a relaxation ritual you can practice the next time angry feelings surface.  It can be deep-breathing exercises, imagining a relaxing scene, or repeating a calming word or phrase, such as, "Take it easy."  

7.  Get some exercise.

• Physical activity can provide a healthy outlet for your emotions.  If there is a situation at work that is causing frustration or anger, consider doing some physical activity just before or just after work.  Physical activity produces the "feel good" chemicals that leave you feeling happier and more relaxed than you were before you worked out.